Dear Super Dennis,

We came home one day, because that’s how so many Dennis stories start. You were a great greeter, planting yourself right in the path of anyone who entered the house, and this day was no exception. Except this time, you rustled as you hurried to the door.

Once we got inside, we noticed kleenex and plastic garbage spread around the room on the floor, as if someone had scattered them.

And we immediately knew why:

For some reason, you’d decided it was a good idea to check out the little trash can in the bathroom, where we’d used a grocery store bag as a liner. Apparently, there was a good reason to stick your head through the handle and then fate did the rest.

You didn’t really look all that embarrassed, and you were pleased to have help removing the offending cape. However, we couldn’t help but hesitate long enough to preserve the moment.

Because this wasn’t the only time you did this, we had the experience of watching you rush around the room, plastic bag flapping along your back, debris scattering, as you tried to outpace this plastic trap.

So we went out and got trash cans with lids.

Dear Dennis,

After I graduated and started working as a real veterinarian, we moved into our first home. Built in 1913, the old house had charm, a dusty basement, and nooks and crannies everywhere. It also had one amazing feature for houses of that era: bedroom closets! The  main bathroom was a converted bedroom, so we had the luxury of lots of space, huge old windows and a good sized closet up there as well.

The biggest drawback to that house was the road. We were in a rural village, but our house was quite close to a busy road that ran through the village and traffic went past a good bit above the speed limit most days.

You were a curious young cat. It was a good thing you were a fairly large fellow, because you didn’t fit into some of the more dangerous nooks and crannies, like the old cistern channels or the ceiling tile defects in the closets. But it was common for you to come for dinner with basement cobwebs draped over your whiskers and tail.

One day, the house was curiously quiet. There was more food than usual left over in the cat bowl. We’ve already covered your attachment to your food, so we knew this was decidedly unusual.

We called and shook the treat bag. No Dennis.

When you didn’t even come to the sound of the can opener (if my husband is reading this, I know you give the cats tuna when you open the can), we knew we had to start a search. I started in the basement, worried that you were outside, but I knew we had to search the house thoroughly first.

Because you were a rather bold fellow, there was little fear you’d had a sudden onset of anxiety and hidden for that reason. And there was the food. So you were trapped, you were injured, or you were outside.

Once I finished downstairs and started up to the second floor, I heard you. I took a moment to be relieved that you weren’t outside, and then hurried up the stairs to call and wait for your response.

You were locked in the bathroom closet, which doubled as our linen closet. You’d probably found a nice soft place to take a nap while someone was showering, and then gotten closed in. The closet was in pretty good shape, except you’d urinated in the corner.

To clean the urine up, we had to get an enzymatic cleaner. Regular household cleaners can clear what we humans notice with our weak little noses. However, a cat’s sense of smell is much better than ours and actually may be better than that of dogs. Of course it is, you would reply, just try to train a cat to use it.

Despite the false alarm, you were also in pretty good shape, once you’d made your way directly to the food bowl.

Dear Dennis,

When you were growing, we fed you kitten food. At the time, our adult cat Max ate free-choice, so it worked well to measure out your food a few times a day and feed you separately. You prefered the kitten food, and you were growing. It was no problem if you stole a little extra cat food.

The problem started after you stopped growing. We changed you to the same adult cat food Max ate and fed you both free-choice. Soon, it became apparent that you kept track of how much food was left because you were the one to sound the alert if you could see the bottom of the bowl. And it happened more frequently over time.

Because Max ate what he needed and then stopped, we were pretty relaxed about food bowl management. He spoiled us. We just added more when it looked low, or when someone (you) complained. Sometimes I wonder if you even learned to alternate which one of us you bugged, just to keep us fooled for longer.

But, one day it occurred to me that you were too fat and Max was too thin.

I remember learning the risks of obesity for cats at school. The big problem is the long list of diseases called ‘comorbidities’. These are other health problems that can be related to carrying extra weight and having extra fat cells. In other words, by letting you stay fat, we were exposing you to an increased risk for:

• Cardiovascular disease including impaired lung function and heart disease
• Insulin resistance which can lead to sugar diabetes
• Arthritis
• Kidney disease
• Diseases of the liver, pancreas, cancer, bladder diseases and increased anesthetic risk, leading to:
• Shorter life span!

Fat cats from 8-12 years old are 30% more likely to die from these problems than lean cats. If we let you stay fat, we were risking all the pain and discomfort of these disease and YOUR LIFE. Needless to say, things had to change.

We had to figure out how to make you eat less while offering more food to Max. So we became a meal-feeding household. The food was measured carefully and put down twice a day, and we kept a dry-erase chart on the fridge to make sure you didn’t fake us out and get an extra meal.

Back then, we didn’t have the great resources that are available online. The Association for Pet Obesity Prevention gathers information and offers advice. The American College of Veterinary Nutrition (yet, nutrition specialists for cats!) offers guidelines for cat owners based on science. The folks at International Cat Care also have some great advice on feeding cats.

For you, fat Dennis, just changing the food routine and making sure you didn’t get extra meals was enough to get you back down to a healthy weight. This change also ensured that Max gained back some weight and stayed healthy.

But you never stopped trying to get an extra meal. Never.